I was just spending some time relaxing with my dogs and melting my mind away on the internet when I came by a quote,
‘It’s important to make friendships that are deeper than gossiping, drinking, smoking, and going out. Make friends who you can get breakfast with, you can cry with and who support you and your goals.’
My first thought was well of course, why would I want a friendship to be any other way? But as I thought about it I realized, not every friendship is so free.
I feel like the older I get the less I’m able to handle friendships that cause me any amount of stress. Stress just shortens your life after all, so if you think about it, stress is completely counterproductive. Especially in a friendship. Everyone is busy enough with their own lives and there just is not enough time in the day to do anything that isn’t at least moderately enjoyable. Sometimes this is where patience ought to come in though.
We’ve all heard it said time and time again, that true friendship lifts you up and makes you want to do/be better. While I can not wholly disagree with this statement I do wonder how often people misinterpret it. Of course people want friends who help them to be their best but at the same time it is not your friends responsibility to improve your quality of life. A friend is NOT your personal assistant after all. That falls squarely on your own shoulders. A friend is just there to make your journey more enjoyable. I mean to say it seems like a bit of a cop-out, to blame your friends for your own bad habits. If you really want to clean up your act it is something that you are personally responsible for, and a friend will be there for you either way but you have to be there for them too, and if it turns out that either of you cannot be a shoulder for the other well then this is no true friendship at all.
Friendship is not confined by definitions, there are not any structured set of rules that determines what does and does not constitute a friendship. A friend is simply someone who you can always feel comfortable with; whether your happy or sad, rich or poor, up or down. Remember though that friendship is a two way street, so be every bit as patience with them as they are with you. Don’t ever allow yourself to forget that they might need some support or encouragement too.